My self imposed rules for catching the bus

We all have our quirks.

One of my favourite British comedy shows is called ‘Would I Lie to You‘. On this brilliant TV show the panelists read out random and bizarre facts, ostensibly about themselves, and attempt to convince everyone else that what they are saying is true.

{Spoiler alert} On a recent episode (which you can watch in its entirety on youtube here) there were two quite eccentric claims which turned out to be true, to much hilarity.

Firstly, Miles Jupp, who is a very quick comedian, described his system for drying himself after a shower. He explained that before drying himself with a towel he must brush off his arms and hair with his hands, but that each motion must be done a certain number of times, or a multiple of that number – 20 for the arms, and 30 for the head by hand and 50 with the towel.

Towards the end of the episode, David Mitchell, another very sharp comedian, had to describe his three point system for keeping track of pens. He likes pens, so he needs to be able to keep track of them, particularly if one has been loaned out in order to be able to retrieve it as quickly, and in as best condition as possible.

Now, I’ll admit to also being reluctant to loan out my favourite pens – let’s face it if you find one you like, it’s worth holding onto. But having to count while drying yourself every day after a shower sounds exhausting.

Recently I posted a photo of my bus stop. There are three routes that go past this exact stop and all three travel the same roads to the place that I’m most likely to get off to change to the train, so I can take any and all buses that come along.

Usually I take the first bus to come along. Each route has a slightly different frequency but on average there is probably a bus going past every five minutes or so. However, due to a number of factors it can be the case that no buses come along for more than ten minutes (heaven forbid), or that two or even all three can arrive at once.

One of the routes is always a single-decker bus as shown in my previous post. The other two routes almost always have a double-decker bus, although approximately once every three or four months I see one of them running as a single-decker which is confusing.

So my rules for getting on the bus start with taking the first bus that comes along. Usually.

If two buses arrive at the same time I get on the second bus, generally it is less crowded as people earlier in the route have rushed to get on the first bus. And there is a good chance that it will overtake the bus in front as other people along the route also get on the first bus to arrive at their stop.

If three buses are arriving together I also take the second bus, I think the driver of the third bus doesn’t bother to stop because there isn’t enough room in that stretch of road for all three to pull in at the same time.

However, if a single-decker and a double-decker arrive together I get on the double-decker – since there is theoretically twice as much space on the bigger bus it ought to be less crowded as a result. In this case it doesn’t matter which bus is in front, I’ll get on the bigger bus.

I like to travel on the upper deck of the double-decker buses, there is a better view and because no-one is supposed to travel standing on the upper deck then you always have a seat and never have someone resting their bum on your shoulder.

In the winter time I always go upstairs but in the summer time I prefer to travel on the lower deck. I’ve noticed that somehow the heating in buses either can’t be switched off, or the drivers always think that the weather is cooler than it is, because I find the upper deck is way too warm in the summer time. Opening the windows makes only a minor difference to the stuffiness upstairs so I stay comfortable on the lower deck. But never on the very back seat, which feels like it is heated independently.

So there you have it, my somewhat complex yet logical system for catching the bus. Do you have any such quirks that you are willing to share?